Christmas For Everyone!

So its Christmas morning and I just opened up some sick ish (Big Ups to my bro for gettin a bape shirt from London for me). Anyways, I was thinkin there are certain people that need some specific gifts this year so I created a list of what I am getting them.

Nick Saban- my American History textbook. Nick, when you look for it, count how many times it mentions a football game. It mentions Pearl Harbor and 9/11, but where is Alabama's loss to Louisiana Monroe?

Lupe Fiasco- some major exposure. Food & Liquor was the best album of 06, The Cool was the best album of 07. So where are the grammys and sports cars?

Midget Mac- a spin off reality show on VH1. This is kind of a gift for everyone. I'd love to see the biggest G from I Love New York get what he truly deserves. What sexy lady wouldn't want to spend time Jacksonville's most eligible bachelor?

Jaime Lynn Spears- birth control. Because, well, your gonna get pregnant again.

Mike Vick- All Dogs Go To Heaven on DVD. No explanation needed here.

Common- bowflex. Unlike most rappers, your not a little guy so im not sayin your weak. Its just that I heard you were dating Serena Williams. You dont wanna be the guy who is weaker than his girlfriend, do you?

50 cent- some credibility. When you lost to Kanye, you lost your edge. You need to hook up with some good producers (Hi-Tek, Timba, Neptunes maybe?) and better material (I get it. You got shot 9 times. Cool.). The fact that G-Unit signed Michael Jackson doesn't help.

Greg Oden- high quality medical insurance. You missed a lot of your freshmen year and your whole rookie season with injury. Are you sure your only 20?

Tom Cruise- a good script. Most people would suggest some crazy pills or some perspective, but I remember when you were a great actor. Lions for Lambs, Mission Impossible 3, and War of the Worlds doesn't compare to films like Born on the 4th of July, Top Gun, and Jerry Maguire.

CRS- time to make an album. This is for everyone. Lupe has to promote The Cool, Pharrell is making a N.E.R.D. album, and Kanye is busy being a genius. I cant wait till they can come together to create the biggest album of 08.